So I'm not normally one to post journals about how shitty things are, but since my friends have granted me a total of 4 hours of sleep after 48 hours of running on a few hours of sleep a day, I give to you my shit situation. I'll mark this as a day one of sorts, and maybe I'll post sequel journals as updates if anything noteworthy takes place. I want you to first of all know that this'll probably be kinda long, and I don't expect you to read it. Secondly, I'm on my phone so this took even longer to write this bitchfest than you thought.
I got my tickets for this con while they were still reasonably priced, so at least I saved some money. But once I arrived I instantly noticed that the new location for the con is significantly smaller than last year's, and thus shit like the artists alley would supply a lot less opportunity. Which thinking about it wouldn't be such a bad thing because I'm saving money potentially, but I really want to spend my money and the selection of cool items is super fucking limited and miniscule compared to what they have, which isn't much to begin with. This downscale caused by another change in management is causing some major issues for me such as there's less cool shit to do, all the cool shit there has always been has been downscaled by at least half, and the staff, although friendlier and way cooler this year, are still way lessened and so they basically don't exist. Just based on what last years con was like, whatever score I would've given that, this year's deserves at most half of it.
Onto things that get a bit more personal now. I handed extra money to the person in charge of our room and stuff so that I could have full access to one of four spots on a bed. Had I actually been able to go to bed in said bed, I wouldn't be writing this bitch note, but seeing as how the floor is bringing the worst out of me, avoiding complaining is not something I even want to do. Instead of me in a nice bed with SUPER soft pillows and warm blankets, thanks to two friends of mine and they're inability to think of how shitty I've been treated, I now have a predicament. One friend that doesn't deserve the bed is now sleeping in the other friends spot while other friend is sleeping in my spot because I decided to stay out a bit later than the rest of them. Which wouldn't be the case had other friend decided to join me like he had promised... This floor is like sleeping on a hardwood floor covered in sandpaper and rocks. Which I wouldn't even mind because I've slept in worse conditions, but I have no blankets. No pillows. VERY limited room. And everything smells like feet and shitty perfume down here. Why limited room?
Limited room in this case was brought on by the inability to manage space in an already small room. Six people rest in this room. Six people have their shit in said room. FIVE of them decided walkways and potential sleeping areas were the way to go instead of doing what the sixth person did. What I did was PUT MY SHIT AWAY. I put all my belongings in a single droor or off into the closet and also a nook between tables. Everyone else has something in the middle of the floor, be it shoes, boxes, paper, etc. This creates a smaller potential area to sleep. Which sucks because I am a tired person who just can't sleep.
"But why didnt you just wake up the shithead in your bed or the other shithead who gave your spot away?" Its a great question and basically an answer to my problems except for the fact that I don't enjoy being yelled at. I know for a fact if I take the time to wake someone up, they're just ganna get upset with me and call me unreasonable then be grumpy at me after they wake up from the bed I payed for. I know it because I'd do the same thing if I were them. I know because all my friends have done since we got here is yell at me about shit. Waking them up would cause a shitstorm of bad shit on me, and I don't even want to go close to drama because I know for a fact I'll always be on the losing side.
But at least I got those four hours!!! Woopty fucking do. I got even less sleep last night, which ended in me waking up around 4pm, and even less sleep the night before that! Fuck sleep though, its only good for you. And I didn't even get to enjoy those four hours in uninterrupted succession. Most of it was chopped into tiny nappy bits because my friends find it just sooooo funny to fuck with people while they sleep. They also have this hypocritical sense of be loud and party even when someone's asleep and the only exception to this is when said person is asleep. But did I bitch to their faces? Nay says I for I again, suck at confrontation, and the only time during this whole incident of not sleeping while trying to did I confront someone was when I grabbed someone's hand as they decided and reinforced the notion that my nose is a good thing to touch when I'm asleep. So due to my past sleep deprivation and my friends' lack of social courtacy, I'm left here now with the least amount of sleep, the least amount of bed time, and the least amount of fun.
Let's recap shall we? I spent a lot of money on a tiny convention so I could tiredly walk around the tiny halls like a zombie as I become underwhelmed by the site of things I should want to buy. On top of it, I get berated only when I step out of line as our "leader (fuck you I don't see you as a leader but everyone else does)" and or peers do the same exact shit and get away with it.
And I'd like to add here this isn't the only time I've been yelled at for doing shit I normally do. Ever since a recent event that caused me to be less sociable, most of my time spent with friends is spent being yelled at... Anyway...
After getting berated by hypocracy, I come to find the events and panels here are boring and uninteresting for the most part. And when I go to sleep my troubles away, I get interrupted and when I try a second time, I get stuck between a rock and a literal hard place.
My only wish is that my friends not read this until they can't bring it up in person any longer, and that tomorrow be better. Maybe I'll be able to get a full night's sleep in that bed I payed for...
As a side note, I'm filled with irrational rage and loathing at the moment and if this journal finds its way to a friend in this hotel room. Fuck off. Don't confront me about it. Just keep on doing what you're doing and leave me be so I can wallow in the pile of salt. All confronting me will do is make me even more upset and then depressed followed by me just giving up and finding my way back home where I'll proceed to never want to talk to your ass again. (Also, there are only two people that would even check their dA so if someone else decides to talk to me about my saltyness, I know who to fucking blame and there goes my compassion for three people because I'm an emotional wreck and a mental hurricane).
To the rest of you. I'm not normally this bad. I promise its just where my life is right now. I'll get better and I promise never to go to Wasabicon again.
Until next time,
A person of salt in a sea of butthurt.
p.s. I'm also kinda really hungry because con food is expensive and I'm cheap. Not to mention all anyone brought was snack food and drinks. Except for this muffin which will not only not fill me, but also probably somehow get me in trouble or lead to someone bitching about how they didn't get the last blueberry muffin. Gods I wished I lived in the middle of nowhere sometimes...
Listening to: Unintelligible noises and the loud elevators.
Watching: My fucks float away.
Playing: A very dangerous game.
Eating: I fucking wish I had something to eat...
Drinking: Mtn Dew and Ginger Ale